i think i know what it means to come to the end of yourself.  and i’m not really sure i signed
 up for this.  i thought i was agreeing to a fantastically beautiful, adventurous, and purposeful life. and i was.

but i also unknowingly signed up for surrendering all my desires.

and no longer getting to choose who i love and minister to.

and not getting to decide how and when God provides the things we need.

and not getting to be warm whenever i want to be warm.

and not getting to always be comfortable and lay low.

but, it was about time i learn these lessons. the funny part is, i feel so much better. so much cleaner. and quite a bit more whole.